Life

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6 Ways Baby No. 2 Made My Family Feel Complete

by Dina Leygerman

Although I was never a child who dreamed of getting married and having babies, I figured eventually those things would come my way. That is the kind of thinking one has when one grows up in a nuclear family. I grew up with a mom, dad, and a brother, so I always kind of figured that is the way things were "supposed" to be. And while I always assumed I'd have two kids, baby number two made my family feel complete in ways I couldn't have imagined. I figured I'd have two kids because I grew up with a sibling, and I honestly enjoyed having a brother around, even when my mom forced me to take him along with me to a bunch of parties I went to as a teenager. I didn't, however, realize how a second child would change my life for the better.

When I had my daughter, my eldest, I was thrilled (and after the initial shock of new motherhood, of course). My daughter filled my heart with a kind of love I never knew existed. At the moment, I felt complete, like our family was more than perfect. But, honestly, after a few years, I started yearning for another baby, and since I always figured I'd have two my husband and I decided to try again. It all happened pretty fast and I was pregnant instantly. Secretly, I wanted a boy, since I already had a girl. You know, the dream of having one of each. But I honestly would've been just as happy with another girl, to. After all, a healthy child is what any parent really wants.

The thing about having children, though, is that one can truly understand what it's like to have one... until they do. And just like the lack of understanding about having one, comes the lack of understanding about having two. Just because someone has a child, doesn't mean that someone can appreciate what it's like having more than one child. Let me tell you something, having two is definitely not the same as having one, and our second completed our lives in so many ways.

He Is So Easy

My daughter was a difficult delivery, and she was no picnic when we brought her home either. She refused to latch, cried nonstop, had colic, acid reflux, and jaundice. It was "first kid hazing" at its finest. My second, however, was probably the easiest baby I ever heard of. He latched instantly, slept through the night pretty much right away, and was just simply an easy baby. His arrival made everything seem as it should.

He Showed Me That Love Is Infinite

Who knew you could love another baby as much as you love your first baby? I sure didn't. I mean, my mom always told me she loved me and my brother the same, but I always figured I was her first and favorite. Clearly, I was wrong. My son showed our family that love knows no limits, and now I realize we'd probably love a third, fourth, and fifth baby just the same.

(We will not be having any more kids, but you get the point.)

He Brought Us All Closer Together

I don't know how or why exactly this happened, but our new addition brought our whole family closer together. I'm not talking about just my immediate family, either. I'm including my parents and in-laws and all of our siblings, too.

He Teaches His Sister Empathy & Compassion

Without her brother around, my daughter was, well, a little selfish to be honest. I mean, she couldn't help herself: she was the first baby in the family and she was the first baby for everyone in our extended families, too. So, her arrival was a huge deal and she was spoiled by everyone around. Her brother's arrival, however, made her realize that she isn't the only person in the universe and he taught her what it's like to care for someone else.

He Completed Us

Having a boy and a girl is the dream, right?! Well, it was mine, so I am definitely living my dream.

He Forced Us To Slow Down

Before our second, my partner and I were running around all over the place with our first. We had signed her up for a bunch of different activities and our lives were revolved around her and only her. We were hamsters in her wheel. When our son was born, however, we all learned to slow down, and that was beneficial for everyone.