This is a good option for couples with a baby or very young child who can't really participate in the wedding. Mention your child's name in your vows to each other, and declare your promise to raise them with love and joy.

Frank Harlan, a wedding officiant interviewed by Offbeat Bride, offered his vow ritual for blended families: After having the couple say a few loving words to each child, the entire family vows to love and respect one another. Then the children make three promises to the family, usually written by the parents. They can be serious ("Do you promise to be the best person you can be?"), funny ("Do you promise not to put the orange juice back in the fridge if it's empty?"), or a little of both.

Couples wear rings as a symbol of their commitment, so why not include the kids in the tradition? After the rings are blessed and exchanged, you can give each child a pendant, bracelet, pin, or other piece of jewelry with a meaningful design or message. The Family Medallion was created especially for blended families, and the design — three linked circles —represents the two parents and their children. Or go with a custom-made piece like this bracelet from Etsy, which features two discs saying, "I love you" and "Your daddy made us family; you made us friends."

As The Knot explained, the unity candle ceremony at weddings represents the joining of the two families. Typically, the mothers of the bride and groom light individual candles, which the couple then use to light one larger candle in the center. For a wedding with children, you could tweak the tradition by giving each child a candle to be lit by the parents (with supervision for the smaller ones, of course), then having everyone light the central pillar candle. Etsy has a wide variety of family unity candle sets, many of which can be personalized with each person's name.

Other (less flammable) options are having each child place a flower in a vase to make a bouquet, or making a sand vase with each family member pouring in a different color of sand.

If the children are old enough, you could invite them to either help you write your vows or let them do the whole job themselves. Talk to them about what the vows mean and what promises they think are important for a couple with children to make. (You'll probably want to look over the finished product before the wedding, just to make sure you won't be asked to promise never to tell your stepkids to clean their rooms.)

Florida wedding planner Weddings by Christina wisely acknowledged that children entering blended families may feel conflicted or reluctant about participating in the wedding. Her advice: Don't force or bribe a child to take part if they don't want to; instead, have the stepparent emphasize in the vows that they will love and honor them and encourage their dreams. If the child is coming from a first marriage that involved abuse or neglect, the stepparent could vow: "I promise to provide a safe, loving, and supportive home for you and your (parent)."

If you and the kids have favorite books, movies, or other references that make you feel closer to one another, you can incorporate them into the vows for an even more personal touch. For example: "Devyn and I are definitely Ravenclaws, and you and Alana are Gryffindors, but together our two houses stand strong against any dark forces that may come our way!"