When our daughter was just 4 months old, our foster/adoption agency called at 8 p.m. on a Wednesday night and asked my partner and I if we would be able to take an emergency foster placement. We had signed up with the agency specifically to adopt, but we had been licensed to foster, too, so we said yes and became accidental foster parents. It was the single most transformative thing I've ever done. Not only did being a foster mom teach me about parenting, but it also taught me invaluable lessons about society, about my own strength, and about what my unique family values.
It's hard to believe, but 19 months ago this week, my husband and I met our daughter. She joined our family through adoption and she is downright magical. Her adoption was simple and straightforward, and although becoming a mom was one of the most momentous occasions in my life, fostering is what stretched and changed me in the last year. Because we were able to bring our daughter home from the hospital when she was only a few days old, I have often felt like I actually gave birth to her. No, I wasn't ever pregnant and I didn't go through labor and delivery, but it feels like she's been part of our family forever.
In the course of a year, my partner and I had two emergency foster placements that lasted a few weeks, and we had one foster placement that lasted two months. Meanwhile, we've walked alongside foster families in our agency and have learned so much about the foster system thanks to those relationships. All of those situations have taught me so much about parenting, including the following: