Life
All hail our Felis catus overlords, World Cat Day is upon us at last. I’m not sure we can worship them any more than we already do (thank the Egyptians for setting such a high bar) but it’s worth a shot: our furry-fisted rulers demand nothing less than total adoration on this special day. It’s a wonder they allow us to get away with only dedicating one day a year to them. So here are 14 Instagram captions for World Cat Day, or any other day, to pay tribute to our most benevolent cat royalty.
First, a little background on the feline-friendly holiday: according to National Today, World Cat Day occurs on August 8th every year. It was started back in 2002 by The International Fund for Animal Welfare, a charity organization whose stated goal is to help domesticated and wild animals alike. Also, mark your calendars for August 17th, as this is National Black Cat Appreciation Day, according to National Today. Black cats may be given a bad reputation for being bad omens, unlucky, or even in league with the devil, but owners of these beautiful cats know otherwise (except for being friends with Satan, sometimes our kitties do seem a little devilish). So here are some fun ways to pay homage to your cats on Instagram (just be forewarned: your cat may become an influencer and become even more high maintenance).
1
It’s World Cat Day, AKA, every day of the year.
It's true that we celebrate and worship cats every waking minute, so is it sup-purr-fluous to have a World Cat Day? Not in the least. At least, not as far as your cat is concerned.
2
I served him breakfast in bed. He’s not a meow-ning person.
Today (as is every day) is a time to completely pamper and treat your cat like royalty. Breakfast in bed, back massage, being carried around in a golden palanquin — nothing is too good for little Mittens.
3
Long live the king!
This classic Lion King line is best used in any circumstance when a cat is on a ledge, or holding a paw out, or otherwise engaged in dirty Hamlet-esque political plots. He just can't wait to be king, you know.
4
My cat after catnip: “Dude, they’re called paws, but you never see them paw.”
Does your cat like to partake in catnip? You should give them a sampler of various catnips to try this World Cat Day, like Pawple Haze or Chunky Mousey. Just be prepared to put up with excessive purring and inane observations.
5
Hot Purr Summer
It's Hot Purr Summer, meaning that cats should be even less apologetically confident than normal. Your cat is hot and she knows it, she could break the internet but she'd rather just break some of your stemmed wineglasses.
6
Dog kisses: “I love you I love you I love you.” Cat kisses: “I am going to exfoliate you down to the bone.”
There's nothing more beautiful than having several layers of skin being rubbed off of your face as your cat gives you a loving bath. The uncomfortable sandpapery experience is honestly worth that precious bonding time with your kitty. Plus, might as well get rid of all that dead skin.
7
Growing up with a cat prepares you for the real world; you get used to being silently judged all the time.
Cats like to show us a bit of tough love. For those of us who grew up with cats, we've learned some important life lessons from our feline mentors: we're always being silently judged, we always should know who the REAL boss is around here, and a little bit of bribery never hurts.
8
Cats around kids: “Yes, I accept your adoration, but I also accept currency in the form of treats.”
Cats will sometimes tolerate hugs, as they recognize this is a physical form of human reverence and adoration. However, they would much greatly prefer you express your total devotion in the form of treats or cold hard cash.
9
There are two basic cat personalities: the “10 feet of personal space and schedule an appointment to pet me” type, and the “enjoy waking up to my butt on your face” kind.
There's really no in-between: cats either highly value their own personal space, or highly disregard yours. Hopefully your personalities match up.
10
We’re having a chintimate moment.
The one time a cat completely lets its guard down with you is when you give it those precious chin scratches. Can you blame them?
11
There’s no such thing as a crazy cat lady, just a person who knows where the chips will fall come the cat uprising.
There will be a lot of contrition regarding the whole "crazy cat lady," once the revolution comes and cats assert themselves in their rightful role as our masters. Expect Cats to win all the Oscars that year.
12
Me: “Here is every toy known to existence, and a $200 scratching post.” Cat: “Is that new carpet?”
You can lead a cat to water, but that cat is going to abandon that water and find some nice furniture to unleash total ruination upon the upholstery. Don't even bother with the scratching post.
13
Fun science fact of the day: Cats are a non-Newtonian fluid.
A non-Newtonian fluid will change in viscosity depending on stress levels, as will cats. I challenge any physicist to prove this wrong.
14
Nose boops: the only source of 200 percent re-mew-able energy
There's nothing more energizing than a good boop on a cat's nose. In fact, it is a mysterious form of energy that one can only assume comes from the fourth dimension, where cats slip off to every now and again.
