While this lesson, like every lesson that follows, is something that people other than your parenting partner can teach you, there's a deep and intimate level of understanding that comes only from going through parenthood with someone.

Since becoming a parent, and learning about parenting with my partner, I've accepted that sometimes it's necessary to ask for help. This took me a long time to learn, but it's a very important lesson that has helped me in every other aspect of my life. If you have someone to help you, you have to make sure you're asking for help when you need it because, let's face it: you need it. We all need it. Long days, sleepless nights, hours spent wondering if you'll be able to use the bathroom without rushing, the list goes on. Ask for help.

There are countless reasons why it can be difficult to ask for help. For me it's a strange combo of past trauma and stubbornness. But whatever the reasons, there are some moments that require we receive support. My partner does an amazing job of reminding me that he's here, that it's his duty to raise our child, and that he's committed to making sure that I never feel like I'm doing things alone. That always makes it a bit easier for me to even start to ask for help... from him or someone else.

Those feelings of fear, worry, shame, guilt, excitement, helplessness, happiness, and joy that you experience? Yeah, your parenting partner feels them, too. They may not always say it or express those feelings in ways we can understand, but they're navigating a whirlwind of emotions just like we are.

My partner is teaching me to accept the fact that I'm not alone. Even in those moments where I feel the most alienated, I'm not alone. Those moments when I want to cry and scream into the pillow, I'm not alone. Your parenting partner can teach you that you're in this together and help you come up with ways to feel less alone.

Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing enough. Well, most of the time I feel like I'm not doing enough.

I'm so thankful that I have a partner who keeps it real with me, every single day, and reminds me that I'm doing a great job. It's easy to get lost in the minutes, hours, day, and weeks as a parent. As a mom who works from home and is the primary caregiver to our child, I often find myself losing track of the time, like: What day is it? And in what month? This clock never seemed so alive! My partner teaches me that I should be more honest with myself about how much I work and how important that work is.

It's totally normal to ask friends and family for advice about different things. I think that's especially true when you're a parent, and you want to pick the brains of other parents. Sometimes, though, it's better to bring those questions and concerns directly to your partner, instead of anyone outside of your immediate family.

We all have different things about our families that make them unique. Add those things to factors like race, class, disability status, income, religion, and more, and things get even more complicated. There is no one else who can help you make sense of and respond to the parenting issues in your life than you parenting partner. This is the person who goes through it all with you, watches your child grow with every day, knows your child's different cries, and knows what makes your kid feel the most happy and safe.

Of course, I turn to friends and family for some things, but there are some things that are honestly no one else's business and I just know that no one could help me or guide me like my parenting partner could.