An “uptick in contractions” is one of the main signs you’re dilating, Dr. Shirazian explains, since contractions contribute to dilation. Still, there’s no need to be alarmed or assume you’re in active labor until you’re having consistent contractions that happening closer together and gaining in strength.

“Typically contraction frequency, duration, and strength can give us a good picture of how far along we are in labor,” says Jada Shapiro, a postpartum doula and founder of boober. “People in early labor (less than 6 centimeters dilated) will usually have contractions that are anywhere from 20 minutes or more apart to 6 minutes apart.”

She explains that women who are not that dilated yet can typically speak through their contractions, and might be able to engage in other activities, like talking or watching TV. But when your dilation is more advanced, (say, 6 to 8 centimeters along), then you might have a harder time focusing on anything but the contractions.

Let’s say that you just can’t wait for your next OB-GYN appointment to know if you’re dilating. Can you feel your cervix dilating at home? Well, technically you can do your own cervical self-exam — if you know what you’re looking for (and you might want to think twice about attempting it at all if you have super long nails).

If your cervix (which you might be able to feel at the end of your vagina), feels thick and hard, effacement might not be underway yet. If it feels thin and mushy, you could be dilating. But you might want to leave the poking and prodding to the experts, advises Shapiro. “Technically, someone in labor could reach in and feel their own cervix, but unless they’re trained, they likely won’t be able to assess how many centimeters dilated they are,” she says.

If you’d rather learn how to know you’re dilating without checking, trust that when you see your mucus plug, it’s a good sign you’re beginning to dilate. But what does it even look like?

“It’s a glob of mucus that is filled with brownish discharge and maybe a little blood,” says Juliana Parker, RNC-OB, a labor and delivery nurse. “Alarming as it may be to some, it’s not even a reason to call your doctor; just be on alert that labor may be starting soon.” You can tell it apart from normal vaginal discharge by its color and because it’ll be thicker, too. You might pass it while you’re peeing or pooping, so you might not always notice when it comes out. But if it does, dilation is underway. Losing your mucus plug is not the same as your water breaking, so there’s no need to panic. It can happen anywhere from a couple weeks to a couple hours before labor, and more than once.

If you thought that your mucus plug and the bloody show were the same thing, think again. While they are both pivotal in alerting you that your pregnancy is transitioning into labor, they both serve different purposes. Although its name might seem kind of graphic, the bloody show is a surefire sign that labor is well on its way. It’s a discharge of mucus that is often pink or brown. Unlike your mucus plug, which works to keep your cervix sealed off, the bloody show signifies that the blood vessels in your cervix are breaking as you dilate. So once you see the bloody show, it’s a sign that the real show is about to start.